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Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

A perfection of means, and confusion of aims, seems to be our main problem. - Albert Einstein

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it. - Steven Wright

People with coughs don't go to the doctor; they go to the concert.

A beautiful woman moved in next door. So I went over and returned a cup of sugar. "You didn't borrow this." "I will." - Steven Wright

Why do they report power outages on TV?

Half the people you know are below average.

I don't believe in astrology; I'm a Sagittarius and we're skeptical. - Arthur C. Clarke

Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool? - George Carlin

Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did. - George Carlin

Crime doesn't pay... does that mean my job is a crime?

There's a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it. - George Carlin

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. - George Carlin

#define QUESTION ((bb) || !(bb)) - Shakespeare

After all is said and done, usually more is said.

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